Post #427

Calvin and Hobbes is back in newspapers. Yes, they're reruns of the original strips, but isn't that better than a lot of the nonsense and non-funny going on in the comics these days? So go enjoy it now while you can, assuming your paper is carrying it. Maybe it's just our paper, but I can't really see the Post as being that ahead of any other paper out there. Except maybe in photography. We do have some nice photographers here. Like that Chris Lee guy. He takes some okay pictures here and there.

Jerk.

And I mean that in the nicest way. I just want his job is all, so you can see where that little outburst came from. Or not.

I have just under one week until I hit 24. It's a shame the producers and high-ups over at Fox decided to go with that other show by the same name instead of doing a real-time show about me turning 24. Shoot, I might have even watched it. Then I could have made $many and bought myself a new stand-up mixer for the kitchen. And then have racing stripes painted on the side.

Just because I can, I decided to "map out" my life cycle, making noted of any high points I hit as I get older. And, also because I can, I'm going to share it with all of you.

Birth: seems important enough. Without that, there'd be no this.
2: beginning of "the terrible twos." I don't know if I was terrible or not, nor do I know why 'two' is plural. Is it so bad that it actually runs over multiple years, delaying the onset of three?
10: double digits. Woot.
13: onset of the teen years. Puberty sets in, and everyone is miserable until age 35 or so.
16: driving. Hot times.
18: voting, tobacco, porn, and, even better, suing. Hot, legal action! Actually, Good Friend Tom, on his 18th, went out and bought some smokes and a Playboy, simply because he could. Not to sure whatever happened to the items in question. We were originally going to sneak the PB into Anthony's book bag one day and see what his reaction would be, but I don't think we ever got around to it.
21: booze, legal adultness. I'm still not sure what all the hoop-la is about.
24: Janice informs me I can rent a car now. Or, soon, in my case. Groovy.
25: car insurance rates go down "appreciably," according to gramV. Very cool.
35: running for elected official. President, senator, dog catcher. Stuff like that.
40: over the hill. It's all down from here, baby!
55: AARP comes a callin'. Bring on the coupons and discounts.
65: retire? maybe?
100: I plan on getting here for a few nerdy reasons--a.) gotta make it to the tricentennial, b.) gotta see Haley's Comet, and c.) why not?

So there you go. All the good stuff in an average life span. Oh sure, there might be some stuff in between worth doing, but come on. Can anything top an AARP card?


Ed good, Rocko bad!
Dave